Perhaps
you have never strayed back to former mistake patterns in your life. Perhaps you've never found the strength to
walk away from ties that bind you to thoughts and activities that would not
bring our Heavenly Father glory or joy.
For me,
one Easter, as I felt unworthy to even go to church, I still woke before what
would have been time for the Sunrise Service that I so loved. I walked to a little bench beside a beautiful
lake with my Bible in hand.
I wondered what people do who feel so unworthy they do not have the courage or energy to go to church on Easter. This day so many celebrate the amazing resurrection of the Lord Jesus Christ.
I decided I would read each of the Gospels through. By the time I reached Luke, I was feeling a bit tired, yet I was determined to continue. That is until I reached Luke 22.
It started in the same familiar way with the Passover celebration where Jesus presided for His disciples. He broke the bread, He shared the wine. He spoke the words that would have puzzled the disciples. They must have imagined He was speaking in some kind of mystical fashion.
At verse 21 my heart began to ache for Jesus, because He knew:
"'But behold, the hand of the one betraying Me is with Me on the table.'"
Yes, the Son of Man was born to be betrayed and die in a most lonely way and because of the impatience and greed of one of His very disciples. A man handpicked by Jesus to learn from Him the wonders of a new Kingdom.
He speaks wisdom about leadership and thanks them for their
follower-ship. And then he speaks directly
to the impetuous Peter with unexpected and even hurtful words. Peter who jumped up to follow Jesus to the
ends of the earth in the end. Peter, who
spoke enthusiastically and sometimes out of turn and was one of Jesus' closest
friends:
"Simon, Simon, behold Satan has
demanded permission to sift you like wheat, but I have prayed for you, that
your faith may not fail and you, when once you have turned again, strengthen
your brothers."
And as you would expect, Peter was quick to assure Jesus of his
loyalty under any and all circumstances.
I always identified with Peter when I was a young Christian,
loving his enthusiasm. It sounded like
me once upon a time...so sure of my resolve in Christ, so sure that I would not
choose a pathway that would shove Jesus off the throne of my life.
But I did.
As I sat on that park bench overlooking the peaceful lake and
watching the sun rise, I quit reading about then as my eyes were so overflowing
with tears.
The truth hurt. I was not
ready to give up the pathway I had chosen to trod and wondered what this would
mean for me as I walked on into more days of my life, choosing to do things my
own way for now.
Then I read the verse 31 and 32 again and saw the part the Holy
Spirit was etching deeply and painfully into my heart,
"...and you, WHEN once you have
turned again, strengthen your brothers."
He wrote that just for me you realise...that it was even included
is amazing for me as it is not in the other Gospels, just this one -- that I so
love.
We all know the truth of this story of Peter and his undying
energy for Jesus message. We all
imagined the moment after Peter denied Christ for the third time and looked up
to see Jesus watching him in the distance (Luke 22:61) .
I cannot imagine what Peter was thinking. I cannot imagine how painful this moment was
for Jesus, who was already suffering.
After Jesus rose again and was giving last instructions to His
disciples, again He turned to Peter, singling him out and asking him three
times about the strength of his love for Jesus (John 21:15-17).
It was symbolic of a future hope of healing for my heart.
You see even when you do stray, even when you purpose to stay out
there lost in your own opinion of what is right, He still knows your
heart. He still waits...for His grace is
beyond our comprehension.
This is grace. Grace that
says you cannot do anything to lose His love...Grace that says you cannot do
anything to get more of His love, because you have it ALL from the very moment
you surrender your life into His hands once you admit you cannot save
yourself. From that moment Ephesians
2:8-9 are two verses that give you hope in a new life.
Jesus knew what Peter would do and loved him still. Jesus knew what Peter would do and died for
him still. This act of obedience to the
Father took Peter's sin with Him on the Cross.
This act brought Peter the personal forgiveness and personal gracious
love that only Jesus can. It is how much
He loves you and me!
On one of the flyleaves of my favourite Bibles are these words
that I share with you in love:
"I'm saved because Jesus wants me to
be a witness for Him.
He promised that if I tell the world about
Him,
He will tell the Father about me!"